want to meet my originality

After a long time thinking I came out of my room and burned a cigarette, while smoking I was thinking that who i am? And what is my importance in my own life? These are the questions I usually ask to myself. These questions are not enough i have many more questions which will be mention down.

In this world of you guys if you do anything, then you are right and if I try to do something right even for my own self, then you call it wrong. The question is that if i am wrong for myself then who is right? At every step of my life, i faced too many by whom i discouraged every time. Since my childhood i have never seen a person who appreciate me except my AMA, ABU and my elder bro. At the age of 12 or 13 i had an aim of my life and that was to become a doctor, pilot or engineer. But due to more expectations and burden of thinking of you people ( thinking of people = ager ma engineer nae bna tau log kiya kehy gy?)!! after some years i found myself an airplane (smoker). I found people strange, If I praise someone then they think that i must have my own mean in that. Take for instance If I don’t praise them they call me jealous. If i do extra care for someone then they think I love them, but if i don’t care them then i am a selfish according to them. So who i am? and what i should do to make people happy? Where is the cover of my soul? And where is my life? (Sala, Sari zindagi logo k bary ma sochty howay guzaro kiya?) what people will say and what people will think? I really don’t know from where I learnt to pay attention to others?

I live in an world where people has certain norms and values and they are busy to watch other’s life. I think i destroyed myself and i still not succeed to satisfy people. In every community around me, they couldn’t figure me out well. Just tell me one thing what you people want? What are your wishes? Should i send you an application to live free and independent? Why you all have right on me more then i?
Sun’nay ka bhi kar hosla
Jee lenay de sab ko yehaan.!!

I know some people are busy to teach me the lesson of truth, and i know they don’t want even listen the truth. If a gradute doing a sales man job then what is wrong? and why we treat him like he is not a human being.Where is the humanity? and why we judge him with his profession? I want to know that thing which forced the people to think like this? ( Saly log aisy daikhty ha uss ko jaisy wo koi buhut he haqeer Insaan ha ). Look at the salesman’s image which i posted!! everybody can feel that how embarrassing he is looking to fulfill his duty. yar why we don’t understand he is better then a begger. I only know this that ( Haqeer sy Haqeer kam kisi k agy hath phailany sy behtar ha), and this is the truth which we don’t accept. Believe me we have lost our originality.

I realised that hundred of pains are spread on my soul. I know i am from the street where people have no manners and have all the bad qualities. But I am still a human being and i have my own life. I have bulk of fears in my heart, (Fears = Nae yr dafa kr nae krna ye!! ager Yeh kiya tau log kiya kahy gy? Kiya sochy gy?). Just go to hell all of you its my life and i have all the rights of my life. ( meri marzi mai jo marzi kara ). I don’t want that people interfear in my life whether i am a salesman or a businessman. Nobody have right to discuss me. Now i decided that This time i’ll not send you people a request or messege of Free me. I will wait the right time and when the right time’ll come i will fly. Everyone is made of soil and will go in soil, when everything’ll end. so then we should not have proud of our self and should treat equally. Now i lay down on earth, and i have no fear of you gyus. Because this is my originality.